Trudy's Diary Read online

  When Jude left Mark John she came into Daisy’s office. “Want to go for a drink after work?” she asked.

  Daisy stopped typing and looked up, not bothering to conceal her surprise.

  “You and me?” she asked.

  “Sure.” Jude tilted her head toward Mark John’s office and raised her eyebrows.

  “Um, okay. I can go for a little while,” Daisy said.

  “Great.” Jude turned and left. Daisy didn’t see much of her the rest of the day, but when five o’clock rolled around Jude came to Daisy’s office.

  “Ready?” she asked.

  “Sure. Give me a minute.” Daisy turned off her computer and grabbed her tote bag from the back of her door.

  “You know, you’re a big girl now,” Jude said, glancing at the tote bag. “Maybe you could think about getting an actual briefcase.”

  “Really? Is this why you asked me for a drink?” Daisy asked in exasperation.

  “No, of course not. I was just thinking a briefcase might be more professional.”

  Daisy rolled her eyes and didn’t answer. She followed Jude to the elevator bank.

  “Where do you want to go?” Jude asked.

  “Somewhere quiet,” Daisy replied. She didn’t feel like talking over a hundred other voices.

  “I agree,” Jude said. She led the way out of the building and down the street to a small bar.

  When Jude had ordered a gin and tonic and Daisy had a glass of white wine, Jude sat back in her seat. “Do you want to know why I invited you out?” she asked.

  “I assume it’s to tell me what Mark John had to say when he got back to the office today,” Daisy said.

  “You’re right.” Jude sounded deflated.

  “So what did he say?” Daisy asked.

  “You’re not going to believe it,” Jude said. She leaned forward. “Brian lost his job because he helped his honors students cheat on a state test.”

  “You’re kidding,” Daisy breathed.

  Jude gave a smug nod, obviously pleased that she knew something Daisy didn’t.

  “How did the school find out? Did all his kids get the same grade?” Daisy asked.

  “Walt told the administration.” Jude sat back with a satisfied smirk.

  “Walt told them?” Daisy asked. Her eyes were wide and her mouth hung open.

  “It’s true,” Jude said. “I guess Walt has known about it for a while, but his conscience got the best of him after Fiona died. He spilled the beans to the school administrators two days before he was killed. Apparently he had also told Fiona. You know, pillow talk? Loose lips sink ships?” She arched her eyebrows and gave Daisy a significant look.

  Jude was being incredibly callous about the entire thing.

  This news changed everything. If Walt and Fiona had been the only ones who knew about Brian’s indiscretion, would Brian be worried about their ability to expose him? Would he be worried enough to kill?

  She couldn’t wait to tell Grover the news.

  As soon as she left the bar she pulled out her cell phone and dialed Grover’s number.

  “Hello?” he answered.

  “Hi. It’s me. You’ll never guess what I just learned!” Daisy blurted out breathlessly.

  “What?” He sounded uninterested, almost to the point of listlessness.

  “What’s the matter? Have you talked to the police again?” she asked. She couldn’t wait for this ordeal to be over, and she knew that Grover was even more anxious about it.

  “No. What did you learn?”

  “Brian just lost his job at the high school. Apparently he was helping his students cheat on a state test.”

  “So?” Grover asked.

  “You didn’t let me finish,” Daisy said, taking a deep breath to let her rising annoyance dissipate.

  “Sorry.”

  “Anyway, apparently Walt knew about it and so did Fiona. Walt told the administration about it a short while before he died. This is huge, Grover,” she said.

  “So you mean Brian could have been so mad at Walt for telling his secret that he killed him?” Grover asked.

  “That’s exactly what I mean. And since Walt and Fiona were the only ones who knew, what if Brian killed Fiona to keep her from saying anything? Then what if he killed Walt because he was angry that Walt told the school what he had done? I mean, he would have had to be pretty unstable to do kill his own sister, but you never know.”

  “I thought Brian was a good guy, just a little weird. That’s what you’ve always said,” Grover pointed out.

  “Because that’s what I’ve always thought,” Daisy said. “But I don’t know him well at all. I may have misjudged him.”

  “I hope so, for my sake. Thanks, Daisy. I should get going, though.”

  “Um, all right. If you want to talk, give me a call,” Daisy said. Grover hung up. She had expected him to be as excited about this news as he had been.

  Chapter 34

  The following day seemed to fly by. Daisy had to work hard to concentrate on the article she was writing because Brian’s possible involvement in the murders of both Fiona and Walt was uppermost in her mind. She had to rush to finish an assignment, and as the appointed hour for the double date approached, Daisy was becoming more and more nervous. She would catch herself twirling her hair or twisting one of her rings or jiggling her legs up and down furiously while she worked. She called Helena late in the afternoon.

  “I don’t know if I want to go through with this,” she told her friend.

  “What?! You can’t back out,” Helena whined. “You’ll have fun, I know you will. Don’t be nervous about a thing. Dave is a perfect gentleman.”

  “All right, I’ll go. But you owe me one.”

  Helena laughed. “I already knew that—anything you want!”

  “There’s nothing I want right now, but I’m keeping it in the back of my mind.” Daisy managed a smile at the thought of her friend’s happiness. “I’ll see you tonight.”

  An hour later Daisy closed her laptop and headed for home on the crowded Metro. She showered and changed her clothes and gave herself a quick once-over in the mirror before heading out the door to the restaurant she and Helena had chosen to meet Dave and his friend.

  Helena was already at the restaurant, seated at an outdoor table with two handsome men, one of whom would be Daisy’s date for the rest of the evening. Daisy hesitated before joining them, giving fleeting thought to going back home, phoning Helena, and feigning illness or even death. But common sense took control. Daisy squared her shoulders and pushed the gate open.

  Helena saw her immediately and she waved Daisy over. Both men stood up as Daisy approached. Helena pointed to the man on her left and introduced him as Bennett. The man on her right was Dave. Daisy shook hands with both men and they all sat down together. Helena looked around the group brightly, a wide smile on her flushed, pretty face.

  Daisy ordered a glass of wine to calm her nerves, then the foursome engaged in small talk while the tables filled up around them. As the patio became noisier over the course of dinner, they had to raise their voices to hear each other. Dave was attentive and moved his chair slightly closer to Daisy as they talked. Daisy moved her chair farther away with every attempt made by Dave to get closer until she was touching Bennett’s seat.

  “Oh, sorry about that,” she mumbled. She glanced at Helena, who rolled her eyes and shook her head, laughing. Daisy inched her chair a bit closer to Dave and listened to what he was saying, something about his job. She had already forgotten what he did for a living.

  Oh, yes, he was an urban planner in one of the Virginia suburbs. A rewarding job, no doubt, but Daisy wondered whether she really needed to know about every variety of tree being used to populate the downtown area of the city where he worked, or whether the reservoir outside town could be kept secure from people trying to go for a swim at night. She nodded and smiled in all the appropriate places as Dave spoke, asking questions now and then to keep him talking even though she wa
sn’t really listening. The truth was, she wanted to encourage him to talk so she wouldn’t have to say anything. The last thing she wanted to do was open up to this total stranger about her job, her likes and dislikes, and her background. And if there was a chance her job bored others as much as Dave’s job was boring her, then she wanted to keep her mouth shut. It amazed her how intensely Bennett and Helena seemed to be talking to each other. Their heads were almost touching, and Helena’s eyes would widen every so often and she would gasp, or she would toss her head back with raucous laughter. Bennett seemed to be enjoying himself, too. Daisy felt almost sorry for Dave. He was trying so hard to keep up a conversation—it wasn’t his fault that she didn’t feel like talking. Sure, he was good-looking, but that wasn’t what counted, was it? She wished he would change topics to almost anything, but she feared if she changed the topic he might expect her to talk.

  What’s wrong with me? she asked herself more than once. This great-looking guy is sitting close enough to me for me to smell his cologne, he’s obviously got a job that he finds fulfilling and fascinating, he’s clearly interested in me, so what’s the matter? Why can’t I reciprocate the feeling?

  Deep down, Daisy knew why. Her relationship with Dean, and the way it had ended so spectacularly, still haunted her. She simply couldn’t bring herself—couldn’t allow herself—to become interested in anyone else. It was sweet of Helena to try to set her up, but the thought of going out again with this man, who looked like he might be gearing up to ask her on another date, was terrifying. Not only that, but who had time for a relationship when her job kept her so busy?

  She blinked and looked at Dave, who was smiling at her expectantly. “What do you say?” he asked. “Would you like to go to the movies tomorrow?”

  “Oh, Dave, I’d love to, but I really am committed to my job,” she said. “I’m afraid another date is just not in my future right now.” She could see Helena’s crestfallen look out of the corner of her eye. She so badly wanted to please Helena, even to please Dave, but she couldn’t do it. She had known the hermit side of her would come out sooner or later, and she had to be true to herself. She just couldn’t lead him on.

  Dave gave a small sigh and smiled at her. “That’s all right. Helena told me you might not be interested in dating, but I hoped once I turned on the charm you wouldn’t be able to resist.” Daisy let out a laugh. She felt a momentary pang of regret for guarding herself so closely—Dave seemed like a genuinely nice guy who wanted nothing more than to go to the movies—but she didn’t give in to the temptation of changing her mind. She smiled her thanks and the group finished their meal in relative quiet.

  Daisy was miserable.

  Helena called her later that night. “What happened? I thought you and Dave were getting along so well.”

  “We were, and he seems very nice. But I told you before, I’m just not interested in dating right now.” She tried to change the subject. “Did you have fun with Bennett?”

  “Oh, no you don’t,” Helena chided. “You’re not getting away with this so fast. You’re going to tell me why a gorgeous woman like you doesn’t want anything to do with men.”

  “You know the reason. It’s because of Dean.”

  “Daisy, that was a long time ago,” Helena said softly. “Isn’t it time to start opening yourself up again?”

  “When I open myself up, I get hurt.” This conversation was digging more deeply than Daisy preferred.

  “But if you don’t open yourself up, you won’t know how much happiness is out there waiting for you,” Helena replied.

  “I can’t. I’m sorry.” Daisy closed her eyes. She just wanted the conversation to end.

  There was a silence on the phone. “Okay. I’m sorry I made you go out tonight. I just wanted you to have a nice evening.”

  Daisy was miserable. “I did have a nice evening, Helena. It’s not you, it’s me. I’m just not ready for men.”

  “All right.”

  Daisy had a hard time getting to sleep that night. She tossed in bed until she finally got up, made herself a cup of herbal tea, and sat down in the living room with Trudy’s diary.

  Chapter 35

  March 24, 1866-Saturday

  Mama and Margaret and I have been sewing whenever we don’t have other chores to do. All three of us, plus some ladies from church, are working on my wedding quilt right now and it’s coming along slowly.

  Now that the weather is getting nicer and the snow is melting, Thomas comes to the house frequently and we take long walks together. Sometimes he brings Lady and Jesse and sometimes he leaves them in town in the care of the woman who works at the general store. I have spoken to the children once since becoming engaged to Thomas and they seem very happy that I am going to marry their father and move into the new homestead with them.

  Only one thing has happened to mar the happiness I’ve felt over the past several weeks. Yesterday Thomas came to visit and we went walking, as we usually do. I asked him about his first wife and he became sullen and withdrawn. He said he didn’t like to talk about her. I think it’s only normal for me to want to know about her, but Thomas disagrees. He says the less we say about her, the better it will be for everyone. Come to think of it, I have never heard the children mention her name and it makes me wonder if he allows them to discuss her at home. If they don’t talk about her in front of him, perhaps they talk about her between themselves. I hope they do. It would seem very important for children to be able to talk about their own mother after her death.

  As soon as I mentioned his first wife to him, Thomas turned around and started walking back to my house. He didn’t even help me over the snow banks that still dot the fields. I’m glad I’m learning more about the likes and dislikes of my husband-to-be.

  * * *

  T

  Chapter 36

  After the disastrous ending to the date on Friday, Daisy spent most of the weekend feeling sorry for herself. Helena called on Saturday to apologize again for making her go out the night before, but they ended up talking about how much she liked Bennett. Helena and Bennett were going out again the following weekend and Helena knew better than to ask Daisy on another double date.

  Grover didn’t call on Sunday; she had hoped he would. She didn’t want to call him because he had acted so strangely the last time they talked—she figured it would be better to wait for him to call her. She had other friends, of course, but Helena and Grover were the ones she cared about the most.

  That left work. She had plenty of work to do--she had articles to work on besides the women’s history series--and normally enjoyed working, but her heart wasn’t in it on Sunday. Around mid-afternoon she closed her laptop and went out for a walk. She had no particular destination in mind; she wanted only to get out of her apartment and clear her head.

  It was a perfect day. The sky was a brilliant blue, the few clouds were high and puffy. The temperature was just right and a slight breeze rustled the leaves that were growing in the late spring sunshine. It was a good day to leaves one’s cares behind, but Daisy couldn’t seem to shake the feeling that she was missing something. Missing out on something in life that she should have.

  She was meandering along a path in Rock Creek Park when her cell phone rang. Looking at the caller ID, she wondered why Mark John was calling her on the weekend.

  “Hi, Mark John,” she answered.

  “Hi, Daisy. What’s wrong?” Was it that obvious?

  “Nothing, I’m fine.”

  “I’m wondering if I can drop by your apartment and pick up that diary you’ve been reading.”

  “Uh, sure,” Daisy stammered. She had wanted to finish reading it before returning it to Mark John.

  It was as if he could read her mind. “Aren’t you done with it?” he asked.

  “No, but that’s all right. It’s your diary. I can bring it into the office tomorrow morning if you’d like, then you don’t have to make a special trip to pick it up.”

  “Nah, I don’t mind comi
ng to get it. Brian’s on my case about it, as if he doesn’t have enough to keep him occupied. I guess I need to read it, that is, unless you can tell me what it says,” he added.

  Daisy gave him a brief summary of the entries she had read so far. “Doesn’t sound like anything Brian would find particularly fascinating. I don’t know what his problem is,” he scoffed. “I swear, he won’t leave me alone.”

  “Don’t be so hard on him,” Daisy said. “I think he misses his sister and you’re the only connection he has to her. Not to mention the death of his friend and losing his job.” Daisy didn’t add that Brian might also be suffering from the guilt that comes of killing two people.

  Mark John was silent for a long moment, then he spoke. “That’s all true, but he has to move on. Just as I’m trying to do.” He cleared his throat. “I’ll be by in about an hour.”

  Daisy turned around and hurried back to her apartment. She wanted to read as much as she could of Trudy’s diary before Mark John came to pick it up. Trudy had somehow wriggled her way into Daisy’s heart and mind and Daisy wanted to assure herself that Trudy and Thomas lived happily ever after.

  She pulled on the gloves, snatched up the diary, and started to read even before she was seated on the couch.

  Chapter 37

  April 10, 1866- Tuesday

  I have found myself with less and less time to write in my diary since my engagement. It seems there is always so much to be done! The wedding will be early in May, since Mama and Margaret and I should be able to finish all the preparations before then. Mostly we have sewing to complete, but there are a few other things that must be attended to before I can move into Thomas’ house.

  He brought the children with him the last time he visited and it was a joy for me to see them. I do not like when he leaves them at his house or in town to come and see me because I don’t like to think of them alone and I do not want them to think I don’t like them or want to spend time with them.